Representing America abroad is a heavy task. I often feel that I should carry an almanac around to answer people’s questions:
“How much does a house cost in America?”
“If I send my son to America for college, how much money will I need?”
“How long does a working woman get to rest at home after she has her baby?”
“Do most Americans put their parents into nursing homes instead of personally caring for them?”
“Do American children have less homework than Chinese children?”
“Do Americans eat more beef or pork?”
almanacs
When I don’t know the answers to these questions, I can feel their disappointment, confusion, and sometimes irritation. After all, I’m an American. Why don’t I know these things? I guess I could make up answers or guess, but I’m too honest for that. When I explain that I simply don’t know or that America is really big and there are many different answers to their questions, I still sense their frustration. Of course, I can offer my own experience or opinion, but how much value does that have in representing a whole nation? In the last seven years, I’ve spent less than 6 months in America. Although I am an American and have a Western mindset, I can hardly consider myself an “average” or “normal” American. I mean, how many Americans live abroad? That one fact rather disqualifies me from representing mainstream America, doesn’t it? Yet I am frequently asked tough statistical questions about my homeland and sometimes even European countries.
Then there are the highly relative topics such as
“Americans like to move a lot, don’t they?”
“Americans don’t like rice.”
“Is the weather in America as hot as it is in China?” (Or in the winter replace “hot” with “cold.”)
“Americans are rich.”
These are hard to answer. Yes, Americans probably do move more often than most Chinese people. But it’s not just because they enjoy moving. There are other factors that create a desire or need to move. I’m sure there are Americans who don’t like rice; but there are plenty who love it. No, we don’t typically eat rice at each meal as Chinese do, but that doesn’t mean we don’t like rice. We have a more varied diet when it comes to carbohydrates. The weather topic really confuses me. As huge and varied as China and America both are, how can you compare the weather? The rich one is especially hard to approach. When you look at the world as a whole, yes, Americans are rich. But tell that to the struggling single mom hit hard by the economic recession. She’s not feeling rich. And compared to many people around her, she is quite poor.
When I try to explain how hard it is to answer their question, they brush off my explanations with their already accepted stereotypes. After all, it’s much easier to see the world in black and white and simply believe what they’ve been told instead of think critically. (To be honest, that’s true of all cultures, not just Chinese.)
I’m wondering if there is a pocket almanac I could stick into my purse just for these occasions?
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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
That would be tough– I am a relative thinker when it comes to many questions. It is easy for me to see other people’s points of view and I often seem to focus on the exceptions or special cases rather than the gross generalizations. (I’m not even sure if that last sentence made sense).
Sometimes it’s easier just to say that “in my family” or “in my hometown” it’s a certain way for many people.
.-= Marsha´s last blog ..Four inches and four free tickets! =-.
It makes sense, Marsha.
I get this too! Though people in England have a *little* more understanding of the vastness of America. They all think it is the land of perpetual sunshine, buffet meals (so cheap there is no point in cooking) and sandy beaches. That might be because they all go to Florida on holiday and think that is the way the whole country is – LOL! I usually say ‘this is my experience’ or ‘the way it is in my family’ or ‘where I came from’. That is the way I choose to answer, but the Almanac idea sounds like a good one! ;o) – Deedee
It’s nice to have someone who can relate! What a perception to have! I was confused until you said that they all visited FL. FL is certainly part of America, but it’s not ALL of America.
Even when I go to USA, I am careful to qualify what I say with “Where I live in China” or “In my experience in China.” Because it goes both ways. China is huge too and things vary from place to place.
I can SO relate!!!
I just realized the other day that it (understanding a foreign culture) is kinda like all other things we learn. We have to start with some generic basics, and then add on to this understanding as we go. The only thing is that “generic basics” in cultural understanding can come across as huge stereotypes.
It used to really bother me (ok, so it still does) when Taiwanese people assume our four food groups are pizza, fried chicken, hamburgers, and french fries.
But, they have to start somewhere and we do eat those things more than they do . . .
.-= amanda´s last blog ..a bad typo: nail remover =-.
As always, very insightful, Amanda! You are absolutely right! We do tend to start with stereotypes and generalizations and then move on from there.
I have a cousin in Germany who thinks buffalo and Geronimo are “cool”. He also thought for quite some time that in Oklahoma (where I am), that buffalo roamed in the backyard…that all of Oklahoma, and most of the mid- and southwest was a giant prairie with a scattering of houses.