Preparing to Homeschool High School

by Jimmie Lanley on May 20, 2013

My mindset for homeschooling high school. Jimmie's Collage

This week marks the end of eighth grade, the end of middle school for my only child. That season of life is over, and I have only four more years of home education with Emma — high school.

Although I taught in a public high school many years ago, I do admit that moving into ninth grade has given me some anxiety. My (required by state of TN) umbrella school says I have to have a clear plan before I start the school year with recognized curriculum names. The thought that I can’t homeschool on the fly makes me feel boxed in and nervous.

Deciphering what is required by the state and what is required by colleges is a bit confusing. And then there is the whole issue of a transcript and the record keeping that goes with it. The stakes are just a bit higher now, and there is more accountability from outsiders who may not see eye to eye with my take on what home education should look like for my own daughter.

One of my strategies for dealing with anxiety is to look backwards and see how God led me through the past, knowing he will do the same in the future.  We’ve had crazy years when we got “behind” and had loads of emotional trauma. But Emma is still on track.

  • Her recent standardized test scores reflect that she is at or above grade level.
  • She is articulate, able to handle herself in all kinds of situations, and has great people skills.
  • She is a good writer and has a love for foreign language and art.

In meditating on our situation, I sensed these convictions about homeschooling high school. They may be counter to popular opinion, but that seems to be how God normally leads me — that narrow path.

1. Invest in strengths not weaknesses.

My plan is to invest both time and money into Emma’s strengths and passions — writing, art, and foreign language — instead of paying tutors to help her with the areas in which she may be less enthusiastic about or less proficient in.

For those harder or less liked areas, we will do what is required but no more.

I want her passions to blossom during these four years of high school, and I’m willing to sacrifice other areas to make that happen.

2. Trust God to work out the details.

I refuse to be anxious about curriculum choices and grades. Our path has worked so far. It will not fail us now.

I will be diligent to make good choices and keep Emma accountable to her learning goals. God will fill in any gaps we leave.

Armed with those two messages about homeschooling through the high school years, I sat through two sessions this weekend by two amazing homeschool speakers — Debra Bell and Heidi St. John. You won’t be surprised to hear that the messages they shared were exactly in line with what I was already feeling about our homeschool path.

High School Lessons from Debra Bell

I have read my copy of  The Ultimate Guide to Homeschooling Teens, but I still wanted to hear from the author Debra Bell in person once again. I heard her at Real Refreshment Retreat Atlanta and felt an immediate connection to her. She speaks truth in a very sincere and not preachy way.

This weekend she shared story after story of how God ordained different experiences in her children’s lives that have worked to prepare them precisely for the role they now have in life. Sometimes those experiences were sought after and deliberate, but more often than not, they were accidental or providential, I should say.

Her bottom line was be open to possibilities. Plan but hold the plan loosely because you don’t know the fullness of God’s plan for your child.

High School Lessons from Heidi St. John

Heidi is another person I connected with at Real Refreshment Retreat Atlanta, so when I saw she was talking about high school, I made a beeline for her session.

She emphasized relationship over academics and listening to your children to make high school a special time for them. She was very empowering, encouraging all the moms that we can homeschool high school. It is not as scary as we think it is.

High School Lessons from Lee Binz

I didn’t meet Lee Binz this weekend, but I listened to a webinar by her many months ago. I love her no nonsense approach to high school that left me feeling empowered to conquer this task.

I am going to be using her Total Transcript Solution to keep me on track for Emma’s high school requirements. And I am so excited to share that on June 25 Lee will be giving a free webinar about high school especially for my readers. If you have a child in grades 6th or up, I suggest you come listen to her. She will reassure you that you can homeschool high school.I’ll be sharing more about it in the weeks to come.

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imperfect-hs

Edited to add:  I have to share the irony of my blogging blunder. My post was live and being shared via social media, and I suddenly realized I never added an image. This is one of the cardinal rules of blogging:  always have an image or graphic. And I forgot. Imperfect Homeschool and Imperfect Blogging. (But now there’s a nice pinnable graphic for you.)

Blogging is a tricky thing. I want to be uplifting. I don’t want to be a whiner or complainer. And ranting or arguing online is just not my style. That means that the content on this blog stays pretty upbeat and focused on mostly uncontroversial topics.

That might lead you to believe that my life is all roses and picture perfect homeschool projects. That would be wrong.

I choose not to write about the disappointments and failures because I don’t think they will help to build you up. However, sometimes this rosy picture a homeschool blogger paints may work the opposite result. Some readers don’t know that there is a fumbling man (or woman, in this case) behind the curtain, pulling switches and pushing levers to make the magic happen.

So it’s confession time. Here’s the real deal, not all of it because, goodness, I want you to keep reading and the whole bag of reality might be way too disillusioning.

1. My daughter does not like to read.

I wrote an entire post about my daughter’s distaste for reading and how I’ve come to terms with it.  It’s okay not to love reading. Really.

2. Sometimes my daughter doesn’t use the printables I create.

As a toddler Emma preferred plain paper to coloring books. She has simply never been a color in the lines kind of kid. She’s more of a give me a pack of 24 oil pastels and stand back while I make some lines kind of kid.

So a lot of the time, she looks at my printable pages as one of many potential ways to express her thoughts. She might take an idea from my layout, but often she rejects my plan and comes up with her own. And I’m okay with that. In fact, I’m quite proud of her for making the work her own.

I used to worry that she wouldn’t be able to fit in, to adapt to outside direction, to color inside the lines, so to speak. But really? Those things are far easier than coming up with original ideas. She can conform when necessary. Creativity is much harder to generate than conformity. So I let her be creative.

I really like making the printables, so I share them with you even when Emma rejects them.

3. Sometimes we fall off the bandwagon and get really lax.

I hinted at this in my WAHM (work at home mom) post. When Emma had her big surgery, it took us a long, long time to get back into the school groove. Then we moved, and that was yet another distraction. It was really easy to let school slide into a bare minimum that let me honestly say that we did school while not really investing a lot of brain power.

Sometimes I toy with the idea of becoming unschoolers, and to be honest, there were a few weeks when we really were. Sometimes I throw out Charlotte Mason’s principles and do it my way.

I don’t feel guilty about our lax weeks. There are seasons for everything. But it does make it hard to have material for a homeschool blog when  you aren’t doing more than some Rosetta Stone lessons, reading a novel from Heritage History, and doing Teaching Textbooks math.

The solution for us is normally using a new book or resource that injects energy back into our routine.

4. I don’t fit into my local homeschool group and they don’t even know I’m a homeschool blogger.

Surprised? When I went to the Cincinnati Great Homeschool Convention and Real Refreshment Retreats and saw readers and fellow bloggers who consider me famous, it cracked me up. Only a few ladies at my church know about my online work. No one in my homeschool group considers me an expert or a celebrity. I’ve only been here two years, and it felt awkward to come in like a movie star, claiming to be an expert with a fancy blog and multiple ebooks. So I said nothing. And no one asked.

And I really am a misfit here. Most of the homeschoolers in this area are either a very rigorous  classical style or a traditional “school at home” textbook style. Neither fits me. My style of Charlotte Mason education looks more like unschooling in contrast to the homeschoolers around me.

5. My daughter often wants to finish school more than she wants to learn.

Yes, this is the sad truth. Along with not loving to read, this urgency to get school done for the day breaks my heart. Where is the passion for learning that I saw in my little third grader?

Actually it is still there, but it is reserved for the things she is truly passionate about, not the things I select for her or that the state deems required. Her desire to get done is normal for her age and not something I should take personally as an insult or as an indicator of failure.

We do have days when school is a chore. But we have days when it is enjoyable too. Humans have moods. (Teenage girls and 40-something moms have moods!) And it’s ridiculous to think that we should both be excited to do our studies every single day. Some days you just plod through. It’s okay. It’s life. In the grand scheme of things, I believe I am instilling a love of learning and a curiosity about the world that will serve her well.

So do you feel better, knowing these insider secrets? Do you now know without a shadow of a doubt that we are normal people with good days and bad days, personal strengths and quirks? We are just like you — imperfect homeschoolers.

Read more stories of imperfections from other very real homeschool moms.

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